forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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