I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
