it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Alive.
So much puke
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
