Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
