There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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