I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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