I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
