I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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