Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Randomize
