I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
