What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Randomize
