and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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