Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
