This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Randomize
