doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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