I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
