How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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