sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize