i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
