Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
