dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
