We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
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