I hope mine doesn't look like that
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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