oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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