OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize