I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
