This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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