I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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