I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
