How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
