were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
