He had one of those small greek statue penises
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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