I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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