So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
True but thats because hes a fetus.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
