AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
