Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
