Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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