why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
