My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
So vagazzling was a success
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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