I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize