i can't believe i had my finger in that
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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