Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize