There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
So squirting runs in the family.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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