Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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