Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
