Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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