I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Randomize