My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Randomize
