I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
