these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
