I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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