Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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